Star Ship Rollerprise
Mission Sweater (episode 1)
by Annette Schwindt
Space... the final frontier... these are the voyages of star ship Rollerprise, its continuing mission, light-years away from integration: to bring Rollanians and Footonians closer together... to boldly go where no man has gone before.
First officer's logbook, stardate: Saturday morning 11.23 h.
Mission "Buy a sweater for the Captain"
11.24 h: Have conquered the protection shield of the Footonian men's clothing trade area with
step-impulse-drive and are now approaching the selling desk.
11.25 h: Footonian saleswoman coming towards us.
Asks ME what I'd wish for.
Contempt of hierarchy!
Awaiting order from Captain.
Telepathic sigh.
11.26 h: Being the one spoken to, I allow myself to remark that men's clothing is sold here which I as a female individual am not supposed to use but the Captain is. Footonian woman asks – me again – what "he" needs.
Annotation: Common behaviour pattern in Footonian world. These species obviously cannot deal
with the fact that Rollanians have a different manner to move than they have. Footonians try to
compensate this in a nonsensical way by treating Rollanians as absent or unable to communicate.
First directive: Be lenient toward them!
11.27 h: Awaiting order.
11.28 h: Captain patiently joining in and reporting need of blue sweater.
Footonian woman bemused. Retreats herself into the depths of the shelves in order to excogitate
new tactics. Returns after conference with adjutants, an ugly turquoise wool monster with plaid
pattern in her hands.
Annotation: Already heard about this behaviour pattern on our voyages. Some Rollanians don't care about physical appearance in foreign worlds which increases discrimination though.
11.30 h: Refuse in thanks. No gifts. Want to trade. Captain pointing on fashionable exemplar
in shop display. Saleswoman cautiously reports high price, apparently expecting intervention
from my side.
Allegation of minor solvency due to Rollanian origin?
11.31 h: Looking indignantly to the Captain, who insists unaffectedly on try-on.
11.35 h: Footonian woman returns with the respective exemplar from stocks . Have observed market
scenery in the meantime. Footonian men come, chose, try on, buy and leave the trading area.
11.36 h: Footonian woman bemused of the fact that Captain doesn't get my help for try-on.
Getting disapproving glances for contempt of Captain's assumed need of help.
11.40 h: Captain wants to buy this sweater. Directing Rollerprise to the cash desk.
11.41 h: Captain taking out means of payment.
11.45 h: Footonian woman ask ME to pay the sweater.
Contempt of hierarchy!
Prepare the phasers!
Awaiting order to fire.
11.47 h: Captain defuses crisis by handing out the means of payment.
11.50 h: Mission accomplished. Both sides relieved about successful end of negotiations.
11.51 h: Starting to next mission with repeated aid of step-impulse-drive and go on Warp...
Engage!
This text by Annette Schwindt is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 Germany License.